so ive been sick for these past couple of days but im almost fine now. thursday was the worst day so far. i havnt been so upset ever since the day on the bus but tht wasn't as bad. i wasn't having a good day as it was, all through out school i felt like shit. i just wanted to go home and fall asleep but that never happens. i always wind up going on the computer and getting off at 11. ahaha. turns out going on the computer wasnt such a good idea. my friend told me how his mom hasa drinking problem and has alot of other things going on and how he just wants to runa way from everything. and ik how he feels when he says that. i really felt bad for him tho. i started to cry almost like it was happening to me? idk. i dnt like when my friends are upset. a lot of the time im upset becasue my friends are upset. it may not seem it, but i am...you also told me about how i acted toward yew before we were really gud friends and i just have to say im really sorry. i didnt mean to hurt you at all. honest. i was stupid and had alotta issues running through my head, i culdnt take the stress any longer. besides that, i felt like yew were mad at me that day and i rly didn't know why, but i felt kinda lousy, and i felt like a bad friend. so im sorry for that too if i hert yew...i also felt lonley, confused, idk what was rong with me, everything hit me at once and i was just not having a good day. i wanted to runa way like my friend wanted to. i knew i wasn't going to though. friday i first wished i coulda went to school so i wouldnt miss work and then have fun at the pep rally but apparently it was boring as hell and stupid. soo im glad about that and im also glad i was feeling well enuff to go to the homecoming dance....so yah, we showed up in dresses wen everyone else was casual. our lives! ahaha. but we got threw it and sucked it up and it actually turned out to be an amazing time dancing with my friends, love them. i was so tired afterwards but i couldnt fall asleep. that always happens, even when im not sick at all. that had to be the worst nights sleep ever ahah. i woke up every hour x_x. after sleeping i woke up today early and watched some music videos to wake me up. suprisingly my brother couldnt sleep either, go figure. i went to homecoming round 2:30 with mah best friends. commack won 14 to 7! finally! we always lose no joke lmao. after the game i had to come home, im grounded...wonderful. well atleast its not during summer where i wouldnt be able to see anyone. im actually pretty happy today, im not rly upset about anything accept some little things. i feel like u never even notice me. why do i always have to be the one to come over to you. atleast make an effort. u did this before, and i dnt want it to happen again. it relly bothers me. why has every other guy tried to make an effort. the guy i actually really like can't even make a first move here. i dnt understand. im not pissed aobut it, im just upset about it. but whatever, its life, if thats the way yew are i guess ill accept it.
well im tired. its late. kidna dnt feel well. gudnight<3